Pan-Fried Tilapia with Chipotle-Tomato Sauce.... DELICIOUS!

Turn this little sucker

into a tasty dinner...

So I don't usually talk about food much on this blog, but I am no slouch in the kitchen, and every once in a while, I put together a recipe that turns out really well. This is one of them:

Pan-Fried Tilapia with Chipotle-Tomato Sauce

4 tilapia fillets

2 red tomatoes, diced

1 clove garlic (more to taste), minced

1 tsp chipotle powder (more to taste)

1/4 cup olive oil

1 white onion, chopped

1 TB butter

Flour for dredging

Fish: Heat up olive oil on medium heat; dredge tilapia fillets in flour (brush on olive oil for a little more stick) and cook for approx. 3 mins. per side

Sauce: Melt butter on medium heat; add garlic and onion (do not brown); add tomatoes and spices; you can also add a pinch of sugar and salt, which I found gave the tomatoes a nice sweet tang that blended very well with the slight spiciness; cook on medium-low for 15 mins. or until it reduces down a little

FREE DOWNLOAD: The Remix I Totally Forgot to Post on Linkin Park's Contest Site

Well... Linkin Park had this really cool contest where they gave out five stems from their forthcoming single, "The Catalyst," for fans to remix and repost on their MySpace site.

Unfortunately, I stupidly thought the deadline was July 30. It wasn't. It was July 25, and I completely missed it. Now, I'm not a Linkin Park fan, per se, but I always love the chance to remix a song and give it my own spin. So I've posted a link to download my version of "The Catalyst," where I took the stems and re-ordered them into a sort of dubbed-out version complete with Nyabinghi drumming.

Click here to download "The Catalyst (Beat Doctor's Dub Mix)." And lemme know what you think! (Link will be active until Aug. 4)

This is Too Ridiculous to be a Joke

Man... I KNOW that isn't a tattoo of... (deep breath)... Patrick Swayze, in his SNL Chippendales outfit... as a centaur... framed by a double-rainbow... what, the tattoo artist couldn't do Steven Seagal as a phoenix rising from the ashes of his career?

128 Oz. of Haterade: 'Teflon Don,' by Rick Ross

This isn't the album cover, but it shoulda been...

Negligible corrections-officer past aside, I have kind of a soft spot for Rick Ross (pause). I don't really have much use for his raps, but his producers have occasionally done what I think is a pretty good job taking Jay-Z's debut 'Big Willie' aesthetic and sound, and slowing it down a little. On tracks like "Magnificent" and "Yacht Club," from Deeper Than Rap, a '96 Jay verse wouldn't sound out of place at all. His guest spot on Teflon Don's "Free Mason" is equally well-matched... although Jay spends his bars dispelling the winter's Freemason/devil-worship rumors, while Rick sort of courts it... the Freemason part, at least. Although me personally, I wouldn't equate "Maybach Music" with building the pyramids...

Anyway, when he's not flossing over heavy downtempo thudders, the executive-lounge atmosphere is definitely still in effect: in the smoothness of DJ Clark Kent's beat for "Super High" and the rough-edged bounce of the Drake-assisted "Aston Martin." J.U.S.T.I.C.E. League handle the latter, as well the bulk of the production. Unfortunately, none of Raphael Saadiq's recent Motown vibe rubs off in his guestwork on the closer, "All the Money in the World," but as Rick Ross albums go, well... if you liked the first two, you'll probably like this one.

Outer-Space Soul with Georgia Anne Muldrow, a.k.a. Jyoti

I don't know if it's already been used, but if not, the otherworldly future-soul stylings of Ocotea would work perfectly as the soundtrack for any number of "Adult Swim" promo segments. The reverb-heavy, jazz-swingy sound is provided by Jyoti, alias Georgia Anne Muldrow, no stranger to this brand of soul.

It's just that her full, commanding voice is nowhere to be found. Jyoti is apparently an instrumentalist, content with creating shifting, interesting soundscapes.

"Blessed Matches" is awash in atonal piano and fluttering cymbals; "Language of the Flame" is plodding, tense and bouncy all at the same time, and "Unchanged Reverie" is almost a dub-reggae workout, peppered with snare drum and ghostly synth work.

Ocotea is almost like the score to a blaxploitation sci-fi movie that was never made... or kind of like if Ridley Scott had hired Sun Ra to do the "Blade Runner" soundtrack.

Whatever it is, it's well worth a listen. Muldrow and fellow Stones Thrower Dudley Perkins are at the forefront of out-there, P-Funkish, occasionally freeform neo-soul.
Check out samples from Ocotea at Amazon.com.

Yet Another Reason the Swedish Chef is the Greatest Muppet of All

Special thanks to Analog Giant Blogspot for tracking this one down:

FREE DOWNLOAD! Redman Mix: 'Funk Doc vs. the Beat Doc'

Click here to download as a single MP3 (the link will likely expire on July 22):

TRACKLIST

1. Double Deuces (Madlib Mix) feat. Method Man

2. Check'n Me Out feat. Def Squad

3. Get Dirty (Beat Doctor Remix)

4. So Ruff

5. Pick It Up

6. Funkorama (Beat Doctor Remix)

7. Father's Day feat. Method Man

8. Lookin' Fly

9. Blow Your Mind

10. The Game (Beat Doctor Remix) feat. Def Squad

11. Yeah Yeah You Know It (Beat Doctor Remix) feat. Def Squad

12. Love Me Now (Doom Mix) feat. Beenie Man

13. A-Yo! feat. Method Man & Saukrates

14. A Million and 1 Buddah Spots

15. How High, Pt. 2 (Beat Doctor Remix) feat. Method Man

16. Can't Wait (Beat Doctor Remix)

17. 'NIN' Interlude

18. Soopermanluva, Pt. 3

19. We Run N.Y. feat. Hurricane Gee

This mix was created to promote Redman, and not for profit. Be sure to check out Reggie Noble 9 1/2, slated for a fall release date!

FREE DOWNLOAD: 'It's Like That' Remix

'Put the ras klaat in bumbo klaat..."

So, as I continue finishing up a mixtape of remixed and classic Redman tracks, I wanted to toss up a quick little teaser. So click here or below to download the Beat Doctor remix of Redman & K-Solo's "It's Like That (Big Brother)," from Red's '96 record Muddy Waters. I couldn't find a good spot for it on the mix, which will be uploaded shortly.

DOWNLOAD: Redman & K-Solo, "It's Like That (Beat Doctor Remix)"

Boondocks UPDATE: Holy S&^!, the 'Booty Warrior' is REAL

Look, I know it shouldn't be funny, because this man is really out there, presumably forcing himself on otherwise-innocent man-butt, but in light of the fact that it's CLEARLY the inspiration behind 'A Date with the Booty Warrior,' I just can't stop laughing. My boy in D.C., however, says he's going to have nightmares... pause.

Would You Read This Book?

So, based on the following description - which I've patterned after what you'd generally find on a book jacket - would you read this story? I've been working on a novel for a couple years now, and my recent tenuous employment situation has allowed me the time to finally wrap it up. I am editing it right now, and will be shopping it to publishers ASAP. But I'm trying to gauge potential reader interest, so let a brother know. The working title is Chupacabra:

Southern Delaware is just the right place for homicide detective Jack Trappone. He traded in hundreds of murders a year in his native Baltimore for the relatively sleepy streets of Redden Lake, where he spends his days fielding complaints about the town's illegal immigrants and occasionally catching a case. But lately, his days and nights are getting darker. A dangerous gang is making inroads into the local drug market. A strangely-dressed, badly mutilated body has turned up in the woods, and some folks in the Hispanic neighborhood think it is the work of the supposedly fictional 'chupacabra.' As he investigates the case, Jack will join the residents of Redden Lake in following the rabbit-hole deeper than they can imagine, into a terrifying new world where their nightmares are real enough to touch.

128 Oz. of Haterade: 'The War Report 2,' by Capone-N-Noreaga

Swapping camo doesn't make it fresh...

Does it matter that the cover of The War Report 2 is almost, literally, the same as the original thugged-out classic War Report record? Not really. Raekwon basically did the same thing, thinly veiling Cuban Linx II with a new cover color.

And despite the carping of cats who think it's doing a disservice to listeners to try and "remake" your classic record, it doesn't even matter to me that "Pain" and "Bodega Dreams," the first two tracks off War Report 2: Report the War (really...?), sound very similar to "Blood Money" in their use of ghostly piano.

But The War Report came out 13 years ago in '97, when metaphorical references to the Queensbridge ghetto as Iraq didn't carry quite the same type of weight that they would today. And although a hip-hop record exploring parallels between America's war and the struggle of urban youth does have some appeal, don't expect that here.

Backed by a few Scram Jones productions, a banging-but-out-of-place Buckwild track and a handful of lesser-known producers (M3, Araab Muzik, SPK, Neo da Matrix and others), most of War Report 2 consists of the type of warmed-over crime tales Nore was spinning on his solo debut. Three guest spots from Raekwon lend a little authenticity to the proceedings, and it's not like Capone and Noreaga don't have plenty of source material for their rhymes... but a meandering focus and production that recalls some of the more plasticized, hollow moments from QB mates Mobb Deep holds War Report 2 down a little.

The recastings get a little old as well. "Thug Planet" is a boring throwback to "Superthug," and I imagine if I had listened to Nore's other solo work, I would find more derivative stylings.

The final two tracks on The War Report 2, "The Corner" and "Obituary," slow things down and finally bring a little emotion to the proceedings, particularly the latter, where Nore talks about 2009 being a bad year for losing rappers and "having a phone book full of ghosts."

All told, I would give War Report 2 a B minus. Its heart is in the right place, and while you can go home again, you can't always stop your parents from turning your bedroom into a media library.

P.S. What's up with Capone's voice? He had a nice, ashy-but-smoove thing going in the original War Report. So how did his voice get higher since then? Did he have electro-shock therapy when he was locked down?

It's the Little Things That Make 'The Boondocks' So Great

"Okay, I, I see you choosin' the haaaard way..."

Even though there have been some big topics tackled on this season of The Boondocks (Obama's election, emotionally-detached children, uh... prison rape), it's still the little things that make me laugh hardest of all.

It's the little pause that the Booty Warrior (above) leaves when he's about to rape Chris Hanson: "Don't make me ruin that butt... Chris, I'm a... I'm a warrior!" It's Tom's wife interrupting his speech about "those little boy's anuses" with Riley's new trademark phrase, "Pause." It's the dance the little blonde girl does in "The Red Ball" to show she indeed does not have a "permanent, severe limp."

I also continue to marvel at the way in which many comedians are able to make rape jokes - and make them funny - so long as the subject is male rape. One of the earliest jokes I can remember is George Carlin's:

"You don't think rape is funny? I can PROVE to you that rape is funny. Picture Porky Pig... raping Elmer Fudd."

Prison rape in particular, has been the butt of many a joke - no pun intended - over the years, with shows like Oz and even the occasional casual reference in Prison Break providing a wide variety of opportunities to lampoon the "rapey" element of prison culture.

The Patrice O'Neal Show - Coming Soon! also did a two-episode run entitled, "G*ddamn F*cking Woman Elevator Rapist" which, uh, examined the phenomenon of females who rape males... in elevators.

The "little thing" in the "Booty Warrior" episode was the background chatter during the "Scared Straight" portion. From Riley muttering "Pause," "Pause again" during one con's speech, to the inmate's additions ("I raped a few n****s myself!" "He ain't like it!" "Not that much!"). The episode also served as a much better vehicle for Tom's paralyzing fear of anal rape, even though his nightmares are often much more hilarious than the actual scenarios in which he ends up.

I'm not sure what it is about male rape that allows comedians and writers to joke effectively about it. Perhaps it's just a nervous reflex when it comes to subject that, really, no man wants to think about.

Regardless, Aaron McGruder and the Boondocks crew have succeeded again, and this final season is making a good run for the title of best yet.

Riley Freeman's Greatest Moment Ever

From "Riley the Fundraiser," one of the best Boondocks episodes yet:

ALLISTER RIGBY: So you either get down... or lay down. What's it gonna be, sunshine?

RILEY: [to himself] This wasn't no movie. The smart thing was to say yes, get up, and leave the room... but then I thought to myself... what if this IS a movie? [to Rigby] Look, f*** you, f*** the plane you flew in on, f*** dem shoes, f*** your socks with the bell on it, f*** yo' gay-ass f***** accent, f*** dem cheap-ass cigars, f*** yo' Yukmouth teeth, f*** yo' hairpiece, f*** your chocolate, f*** Guy Ritchie, f*** Prince William, f*** the Queen... this is AMERICA. My President is black and my Lambo is blue, n****. Now get the f*** out my hotel room... and if I see you in the street I'm slappin' the s*** outta you."

Watch below: