Saturday, February 26, 2011

Which Reminds Me... I Forgot to Post the Last Setlist...

Oak Ridge Boys? Hell yeah, I'll do some
Oak Ridge Boys. Just not "Elvira."

12/9/10 Books & Beans, Leechburg, PA

Early Set:
Ramble On Rose (Dead)
Rain Song No. 2*
Race Among the Ruins (Gordon Lightfoot)
New Mexican Shuffle*
Southwest Sky*
Althea (Dead)
It Takes a Lot to Laugh, It Takes a Train to Cry (Dylan)
Quite a Night (in Spain)*
Row Jimmy (Dead)
The Captain*
No Expectation (Stones)
Might as Well (Dead)

Late Set:
Rain Song No. 3*
I'll Take a Melody (Allen Toussaint)
Box of Rain (Dead)
New Coat of Paint (Tom Waits)
Leaving Louisiana (Oak Ridge Boys) >
Peggy-O (Dead) >
Deep Space Jam* >
Breathe (Pink Floyd) >
Mother's Meth-Head Blues*
Midnight Moonlight (Peter Rowan)
The Wind Cries Mary (Hendrix)
High Time (Dead)
Atlantic City (Springsteen)
Loser (Dead) >
Lady with a Fan (Dead) >
New Speedway Boogie (Dead)
E: Stagger Lee (Dead)

* Original

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Tonight's Setlist: Books & Beans, Leechburg, PA

I had kind of a late-'74 vibe going during the second set...

Tonight's setlist, from Books & Beans in Leechburg, PA:

Early set:
New Mexican Shuffle*
Quite a Night (in Spain)* >
Franklin's Tower (Dead) >
Henry (New Riders of the Purple Sage) >
Wharf Rat (Dead) >
Big Empty (Stone Temple Pilots) >
Wharf Rat >
Cocaine Blues (Dylan)
Mystery Train (Junior Walker)
Magnolia (J.J. Cale)
Mother's Meth-Head Blues#*

Late Set
Sweet Thing (Van Morrison)#
The Captain* >
Weather Report Suite, Pt. 1 (Dead) >
I Like It*
Madam, Will You Walk? (Scottish, traditional)
Bird Stealing Bread (Iron & Wine) >
Crazy Fingers (Dead) >
Galway Bay (Irish, traditional) >
To Lay Me Down (Dead)
Glendale Train (New Riders of the Purple Sage) >
Me & My Uncle (Dead) >
Deep Space Jam* >
Dark Star (Dead) >
Deep Space Reprise* >
Black Peter (Dead) >
Stella Blue (Dead)
Bartender (Dave Matthews) >
Copperhead Road (Steve Earle)

* Original
# Request

Monday, February 14, 2011

Friday Night Fights: Hockey Edition... a.k.a. New York Goes 'V for Vendetta' All Because Rick DiPietro is a Bitch

"NO ONE goes Tyson-versus-the-Black-Rhino
on OUR bitch-ass goalie!!"

I'm curious what the average New York Islander fan thinks of Fox Sports Pittsburgh's airing of "Friday Night Fights: Hockey Edition" this past weekend, an event otherwise known as the Pens-Islanders game.

My hope is that they would be embarrassed.

The Islanders launched an organized assault on the Pens, all in the name of revenge... and revenge for what? Revenge, basically, for Rick DiPietro being a slack-mouthed, glass-jawed bitch. DiPietro is better at getting injured than he is at goaltending, and if he really thought he and Brent Johnson were going to yuk-yuk-yuk it up at center ice after he clotheslined a Penguin with :16 left in the Feb. 2 game... well... then he deserved to get his face shattered.

On top of that, before the first-round bell rang on Friday, the Islanders were in the middle of putting a lopsided donut on the Pens. What better way to show up your opponent than to whitewash them? In fact, that possibility makes the Islanders' premeditated plan that much more idiotic. The plan should have been, "Okay, guys, if we get up early, don't be afraid to run up the score. Let them start some shit, and we can respond in kind."

I'm not even sure, though, that Maxime Talbot's concussive/questionable hit on Blake Comeau — which, along with the DiPietro KO, is what supposedly triggered Friday's revenga — deserves the thuggish-ruggish beatdown the Islanders attempted. They called up a Vick Mackey strike team of minor-league goons and went open season on the Pens, including career Neanderthal Mike Haley — you know, the guy who looks like an psychotic albino gorilla about to wallop Craig Adams in the most-publicized photo from the game.

Admittedly, I stopped watching the game when it was 4-0, so I had to watch the brawling on highlights. And I actually saw Mario Lemieux's statement prior to watching the highlights, so I thought initially that Mario was talking as much about the Pens as he was about the Islanders. Looking at it now, definitely not.

That's a little problematic for me, because Mario Lemieux employs Matt Cooke. Don't get me wrong. I love the Cookie Monster, but I'm not going to argue with anyone who says he can be a dirty player. But Matt Cooke has never tried to suckerpunch anyone like Martin tried to do Talbot. That was Bertuzzi-ish. That could have been a career-ender if Talbot doesn't catch it at the last second.

Maybe Mark Madden is right. Maybe it's time to ban fighting from the NHL. It's definitely time to do something more about blind-side hits and head-hunting. You fix that, and the only storyline for this rematch is whether Rick DiPietro's face looks like the end of Rocky I or IV.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Screw Baseball. And the Pirates. Mostly Ross Ohlendorf.

Coincidentally, this is almost my exact feeling
about the last 17 years of Bucco baseball.

Ross Ohlendorf just won his MLB arbitration hearing, upping his new contract by about $1 million. He asked for arbitration — and won — after going 1-11 last year, with 4.07 ERA.

I know sports blows everything out of perspective, including contracts, but let's just attempt to put this into real-world terms. Let's say Ross Ohlendorf is a regular working stiff. This would mean that Ross was given 12 assignments over the course of six months. On 11 of those assignments, he failed miserably.

He then asked for a raise. And got it. His 4.01 ERA is literally middle-of-the-pack if you look at MLB team pitching stats in 2010. Why should he nearly double his salary for that performance?

Yahoo Sports said that arbitration panels take a player's whole career into account during these hearings. Fine. During his whole career, Ohlen-Douche is 13-25, with a 4.40 ERA. So, the question then becomes: Wha... tha... fa...?

I'm with Mark Madden on this one: f*ck baseball.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Keisel 3:16... I Got a Fever, and the Only Prescription is More Beard

• When the Packers hold 'Game Night' and play Clue, there is only one suspect: Brett Keisel, in the backfield, with the beard.
• If Bam Morris had Brett Keisel's beard, he would have had a much better place to hide all that weed.
• If Neil O'Donnell had Brett Keisel's beard, no one would know who the f*ck Larry Brown is.
• Legend has it that Brett Keisel's beard is what enabled Cortes to conquer ancient Mexico. The Aztecs mistook it for their supreme god, Keizelcoatl.
• Sidney Crosby's Frito Bandito pube-'stache wants to be Brett Keisel's beard when it grows up.
• Brett Keisel's beard can fold a piece of paper in half eight times.
• Brett Keisel's beard is so frightening, it's not a beard. It's a feard.
• If Bill Buckner had Brett Keisel's beard... ironically, no one would know who Bill Buckner was. Kind of funny how that one works.
• SPOILER ALERT: In the season finale of "Big Love," Brett Keisel's beard beats up Bill Paxton and takes all his wives.
• If Stringer Bell had Brett Keisel's beard, Brother Mouzone really would be selling beanpies. In a wheelchair.
• Brett Keisel's beard once appeared on NBC's "Minute to Win It." In 27 seconds, it kicked Guy Fieri's stupid bi-colored, tri-pronged beard's ass, took his girl and ate his food.
• Brett Keisel cannot braid his beard. If he does, he will spontaneously sprout two large horns and spend Super Bowl week pillaging the greater Arlington area.
• While at Harvard, Mark Zuckerberg befriended a janitor who was fired from the Steelers' training facility for locker-room theft. The man sold Zuckerberg a single hair from Brett Keisel's beard, which he ground into powder and snorted. Two hours later, he created Facebook.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Super Bowl Week: Oh, the Irony...

I find it highly ironic that Matt Hasselbeck is involved in this "anti-pornography" Super Bowl party. Particularly when you consider that the only redeeming thing about him is how badly I want to see a picture of his sister-in-law's breasts. (In a lovely case of double-irony, that's also the only redeeming thing about her.)